An Open Letter to Google

Dear Google,

Like many people, I find your site helpful. Furthermore, I enjoy the whimsical logos you put together on holidays. I do, however, find one feature on your site annoying and not at all helpful. And it's the kind of annoying that makes me want to throw things.

I really hate it when I start typing my query and you offer suggestions of what I might be seeking. I set my preferences to not receive those suggestions (a preference that somehow got turned off after a few weeks, so I had to set it again and hope it sticks this time). But even with that preference in place, every time I do a search for something, your system logs what I searched for and suggests it to me when I go to do another search. So the suggestions are fewer, but even so, I am constantly reminded of the time I searched for the phone number of a hair salon or the recipe for chicken fried steak. I hope I never have to search with terms like "itchy butt rash" or "extra large thongs."

I said no query suggestions, people. I meant no query suggestions. At all. Not even suggestions of things I have already searched.

I tried to find an e-mail address to ask about how I turn off this really annoying and stupid feature, but I found myself stuck in a we-don't-want-you-to-find-us holding pattern, where I didn't find what I needed on one page, was referred to another, which referred me back to the first, etc. Some search engine you have there when I can't even find the information I want about your search engine.

So I am stuck writing to you via my blog. You'll be able to find it easily though. Just type "Stapling Jello" in your query box. But before you get to it, you'll have to make sure you don't follow your own advice to look for Starbucks, Sting or office supply giant Staples.

Sincerely,
Erika